Friday, December 2, 2016

ERR

So a lot has happened in my life. My mom passed away and it just feels like I need to get back on my weight loss track for good. I was really depressed and started just eating everything. I didn't think my mother would pass for such a long time. It was so sudden. My grandmother had just passed literally a month before her. My weight feels out of control and I know I have trigger foods. It's Chick-Fil-A and IHOP and anything else with oil and sugar. I thought I would do well by ordering the kids menu and just feel okay with eating it a little but it honestly went back to eating the regular menu because I justified wanting a regular size drink of unsweet tea. I kind of feel like I'm on my own in ways because I really just really hate looking at myself in pictures and in the mirror. Its like why did I change myself to be convenient to everyone. Like life just doesn't go my way anyway so why make it worse? I used to not eat bread. I used to eat breakfast with vegetables before I went to work. I used to enjoy life because dinner was just a meal and not some whole ordeal because things were kind of planned out. I just need to create some normalcy and really just put myself first. My health has declined since my pregnancy started (my twins are now 1 1/2) and with all the stress I feel like I've put on myself it's not going to get better.

I think I need to go back to thinking about the things I want to eat and the things I want to do so here let's make a list of the things that I want to eat and do:

Run on the treadmill: Make it to a 10 minute mile.
Eat nutrient rich foods like clean eating.
Spend more time out of the house enjoying the world.
Drink more water.
Feel good when I look in the mirror.
Not have as many chores to do because my apartment is decluttered.


None of these things honestly have to do with weight loss but I know weight loss will happen if I work towards my goals. I just need to set up like objectives for me to meet to help reach each one. I already have been finding ways to workout in my schedule but my eating sucked so yeah no weight loss.

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