Monday, June 8, 2015
There is nothing like a shopping trip that was supposed to help my low self esteem that actually reinforced more about why I don't like how I look. Everything makes me still look like I'm pregnant. There were women basically in the first aisle I went in making fun of me saying things like how I would just be stretching out the clothes and it would never look good. Why would someone do that? I never asked them to comment about my shopping and how would they know who I am even shopping for? It feels like my first weight loss all over again except I don't have control of the food entering my home. I felt so deflated and really just wanted to leave the store. I just felt ugly. I don't even want pictures of myself but I should face the reality of what I actually look like and go from there. Everyone has some starting point. Mine happens to feel like 200lbs. Too much weight for me personally. I feel like the belly band will become a daily item for the rest of my life like underwear or brushing my teeth.